I firmly believe that our satisfaction and well-being depend on what I can influence.
Autonomy is the freedom to decide how much power I give to external influences and how much external events influence my emotions and my state of mind.
We have expectations, hopes, values, goals, our ideas of right and wrong. We expect people to behave according to our ideas. If they don't, we are "out of our mind", sometimes with rage. If we consciously decide to take nothing but nothing personally, then we give back our freedom and our autonomy.
By giving ourselves this mental and emotional independence, we empower ourselves to do what we want to do. We give ourselves the license to confidently achieve a better and happier life.
The Buddhist Pema Chodron calls being involved in the reality of other people or our dependence on our own impulses "Shenpa".She translates this word from the Tibetan as "emotional charge" or "hanging on the hook".
The discovery of this inner space of freedom and self-reliance holds a great potential for our personal development.
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